ANNABANANA

Way to go dipstick!!

2012-01-13T18:21:00.000-08:00

Today I went to Walmart to get my oil changed. Sounds simple, right? But it wasn't. After I roamed around for a while I was called over the intercom to come back to where my car was. I was told that my dipstick was broken and that they couldn't change my oil without a good dipstick. Since they were the last ones to change my oil they would reimburse me for the dipstick but I had to go get it. So I drove to the dealer, grabbed the dipstick and went back to Walmart. They changed my oil........oh wait...NO. They did not. The dipstick was broken farther down then they thought. So they had to send me to a mechanic...yes a mechanic to get the dipstick out. The mechanic came out to my car and tried for a few minutes to get the dipstick out. He couldn't so he pulled it into the garage to get the job done. So this story should end here, right? Yeah, it should (pause for dramatic effect)But it doesn't! They have to order a tool...yes, order a tool to get the dipstick out. It's too bad because I was looking forward to going back to Walmart for the 3rd time today but alas after running around all afternoon my oil still has not been changed all because of a little dipstick. I have to go back on Monday once the tool comes in. Funny how a tiny little object can be such a big pain. Maybe I'll spend the weekend trying to create an indestructible dipstick. Who wants to help?

I mean it this time..no, really I do

2011-09-19T18:49:00.000-07:00

Dear Pepsi:

I’m breaking up with you.Yes-Again! I mean it this time. I can no longer allow you to sabotage all my efforts to be healthy and fit. I want strong muscles, more natural energy, a vibrant countenance, and firmer abs. In spite of your sparkling bubbles and sweet sugary taste I must end our destructive love affair while i’m still young and cute. Maybe someday we can be friends-but not now. Don’t call. Don’t write! Don’t send me coupons! And no hanging out outside my window making that pshhhhhh sound either!

See ya!
Anne

Do you know where your house keys are?

2011-03-16T22:51:00.000-07:00

I think my fear of heights developed in my teen years but the spaciness thing...I was probably born with.

Today my sister picked me up for lunch and she parked in the back of our townhouse. Our townhouse has an enclosed patio and the gate to the patio has a lock on it. I had taken my house and gate key off the keychain when I had gone on a walk this morning. Do you see where this is going? So, I walked out the backdoor onto the patio-after locking myself out of the house...house keyless..gate keyless and trapped...no spare to be found! My sister started laughing at me. (My sister has 4 kids including a newborn so I'm sure she needed a good laugh) There was only one way out of this predicament and that was UP. Me..Anne P. Turner...the fraidy cat of heights had to get on a tall wabbly ladder, climb up on the roof, crawl across the roof on my belly(which the HOA prohibits, making me a rebel in the eyes of my neighbors for sure,)dangle my feet from the roof hoping that the gutters underneath me don't collapse, while listening to pebbles from the roof fall into those gutters and finally I felt my feet touch the top of my sisters Durango and she was still laughing! Did I mention I was wearing white? I needed a good laugh too..and that little mess did the trick.

New Cousins....New Nephew

2011-02-20T20:40:00.001-08:00

When I was about 10 years old a secret was revealed to me-about me. The dad I knew,the man my mother was married to, wasn't my only dad. My real father had passed away from lung cancer a day or two before I was born. I found out that was where my middle name (Partington) came from and after a while pieces of my life began to be made known to me. For instance,I had siblings I didn't even know about. I hadn't seen them since I was a baby. Over the years I would try to find them but to no avail and I still have had no success.
But, one day last summer I had a voicemail from my mother saying she had something to tell me. When I called her back, she started telling me a story about something that happened to her in the Temple. She was with some members of her ward and one of them was doing work for some Partingtons. My mom asked her how she was related to the Partingtons and she said her mother was one. After talking they realized that Tami's mother and my father were first cousins. For the first time in my life I knew how to locate a relative from my father's side. For the first time I wasn't a lone Partington with no earthly connection to the others...and today for the first time ever, I met in person, my second cousin, Tami, as well as her husband (who also happens to be my mom's bishop) and their children. As I anticipated this day, I didn't know what to expect or how I would feel but as I was driving to Provo this morning I felt a little emotional about the whole thing. My own sisters are out there somewhere and as far as I know they don't even want me to find them and maybe they do but I have no evidence of that and I feel a little hopeless about it sometimes, so to be on my way to finally meet a relative on my dad's side, a cousin who really wanted to meet me,who would invite me to the blessing of her grandchild was the best thing ever. I walked into the church and found her and she gave me a big hug and it was an emotional moment for both of us. She said she knew that my dad wanted me to meet her. I think she's right. I think my dad was happy to know that I felt a little more connected to our family and that our family was more than just some mysterious wonder that I doubted I would ever find. It's hard to explain what the whole thing means to me and it's so weird to think about how life happens...how my mom ended up in the same place with my relatives that I didn't even know. Isn't that just crazy??? I feel grateful for my new cousins and the experience also makes me want to be a better sister,aunt,friend, and so on to the ones who have been there all along.

Speaking of familiar, as well as, new relatives, my sister brought a beautiful baby boy into the world last week. Precious, Landon Spencer Jarvis was born on Friday morning. I look forward to holding him in my arms, changing his stinky diapers and bonding with him as much as possible before his parents whisk him away to live in a far-away land in just a few short months. (Ouch..talk about a bitter-sweet time for me) I love him. There is something about holding that perfect innocent little angel in my arms that makes my heart melt and it makes me want to be a better person too.

BTW, it's not that I don't see the run-on sentences. I'm just too sleepy to do anything about it.

That is all. Good night!!

What I Learned About Angels and Progress in 2010

2011-01-11T00:45:00.000-08:00

At church on Sunday, I started to think about how progress has always meant hardship...from the beginning.

Mormons believe that we lived before this life and that as soon as God presented his eternal plan to us, a war broke out because some didn't like his plan. So in that case..progress meant war. We had a fight on our hands. Then as soon as Adam and Eve took the chance to progress they were cast out of the beautiful Garden of Eden and faced the dangers of the world outside. Things would never be easy again. And why should they be?

Last year, I experienced some "progress" of my own and maybe you did too. At the beginning of summer my insomnia got worse and I experienced the disappointment of having my plans to run, hike, hike and hike some more crushed by a painful case of plantar fasciitis. Not being able to exercise didn't help me sleep better and I started to feel a lot of frustration and hopelessness. Things eventually improved...a little. Then, in October I lost my job and in November I came down with a nasty bug. I had a sore throat, an ear infection, laryngitis that lasted so long I forgot what my real voice sounded like and I had to go the ER one morning because I couldn't breathe. (I guess whatever I had hit quite a few people and hard.)

And, I wouldn't change any of it. Yep that's right...none of it. Because, I learned last year that when we are going through what feels like hell on earth - sometimes in the midst of all that - is when God shows us evidence of his love. When we can't feel it on our own, he just puts it there..in front of our faces so we can't miss it. And he does it through other people....guardian angels, no doubt. He showed his love to me at girls camp during a powerful meeting with my precious Young Women , where I just couldn't help feel his love, after I had been starving for it. He showed his love to me when I was sick and some wonderful people brought me meals and magazines and fresh squeezed orange juice. One of those dinner sharing friends had no idea I was sick but had a feeling out of the blue that she needed to call and check on me. If that's not a guardian angel, I don't know who is. No one can tell me there is no God. No one can tell me he doesn't care about me. I'm guilty of accusing him of letting me suffer unfairly sometimes but don't we all say or think dumb things when we are hurting? But at the end of the day he is there and sometimes if I can't see him on my own..he sends in reinforcements. I hope I get to be a reinforcement sometimes..even if I don't realize it when it happens.

Losing my job was the best thing for me. I was so miserable at my job and felt so trapped. Now I'm free to try new options and I have received lots of support as I've pursued those new options. More evidence that I'm not alone in the world.

So, as I progress in this world, I anticipate some scary and dark times. I anticipate blessings that feel like curses and I anticipate angels along the way to pull me out of the darkness and to help me clear my fogged perspective. And like I said, I hope that along the way, as I progress, I get to be an angel also, to others who are experiencing their own progression. I've seen what they can do...and I can imagine no greater call.

I heart kids

2010-12-29T22:48:00.000-08:00

I've decided I want to start blogging again. I also decided that I needed to choose between making my blog private or taking the pictures of my nieces and nephews off of my blog. I chose to remove their pictures and find a more private way to share them. I love them. I want to keep them safe. I think I removed them all. If you see any I missed, let me know.

Oh...really?

2010-01-25T17:57:00.001-08:00

I love my nieces and nephews. Sometimes they drive me nutso and sometimes I can't get enough of them. My 4 year old niece Maddy has learned a new phrase which she likes to say with a bratty little attitude. "Oh, really?", she loves to say. It's one of those things that you can't laugh at in front of her and can't help laughing at later.

"Madelyn! If you jump off your dresser, Lily will copy you and hurt herself." "Oh, really?" Translation: Am I supposed to care?

"Madelyn it's bad manners to burp at the dinner table". "Oh, really?" Translation: What are you going to do about it?

"Maddy, it's time to put your PJ's on". "Oh....really?" Translation: Try and make me.

Awe...kids....the best revenge any older sibling could ask for.

The Simple Life

2009-11-13T10:34:00.000-08:00

I'm having one of those days where I can't stop thinking about how lovely it would be to bag this city life and move to a farm out in the middle of nowhere and ride horses and raise chickens. I've always lived in the city. I don't know how to grow vegetables or how to raise chickens or cows. But somedays I want to move to the country and live on a farm. I think all the Hallmark movies I watch give me a false sense of romance about being a country bumpkin but I can't help but buy into it and daydream about it while I look at pictures of farms.

I could move to a horse farm in Tennessee

http://homes.point2.com/US/Tennessee/1000807036-Photos.aspx

or this farm in Vermont

http://www.terragalleria.com/pictures-subjects/barns/picture.barns.usvt6522.html

There is always Sweden

http://www.terragalleria.com/pictures-subjects/barns/picture.barns.swed6156.html

Italy is always calling my name

http://socialentrepreneurs.enchantingchallenge.com/?m=200903

I'm going to need some new shoes

and I might have to trade in the Sentra for a new vehicle

Hmmm...This could take a while.

Don't stick a fork in me...I'm not quite done

2009-11-10T10:47:00.000-08:00

I guess we all have those moments where we look up at the heavens and scream something along the lines of... "What gives?!!" I've had insomnia since I was 10. It's a nightmare for a little girl and for an adult it's no picnic either.It affects my ability to function during the day and makes waking up in the morning very painful and almost impossible. Sometimes I take a pill so that I can fall asleep all the way before midnight. I build up an immunity to medication though, so most nights I just have to tough it out and hope that I can fall asleep on my own. It's normal for me to be awake until at least 1:00 or 2:00. Just once I would like to be asleep before 11:00 or even before midnight without a pill. I wonder what it would feel like. Chronic Insomnia is frustrating and lonely and sometimes it makes me incredibly angry. Last night was one of those normal frustrating nights where I couldn't sleep and I felt totally abandoned. So, while only half awake yet unable to fall completely asleep, I asked God "Why? Why won't you let me sleep?!" He didn't answer or maybe I was just too mad to hear him. I don't count on getting the answer I want anytime soon. But this morning I got my daily gem via e-mail and I guess I got the answer I needed whether I like it or not. Today's quote was from Henry B. Eyring.

“Even when you feel the truth of [the] capacity and kindness of the Lord to deliver you in your trials, it may still test your courage and strength to endure. The Prophet Joseph Smith cried out in agony in a dungeon: “ ‘O God, where are thou? And where is the pavilion that covereth thy hiding place?’(D&C 121:1–2). . . .“The Lord’s reply has helped me and can encourage us all in times of darkness. Here it is: ‘My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes’ (D&C 121:7–8).”

I don't feel like enduring. I feel like getting what I want...which at the moment is a healthy sleep pattern. But I wouldn't take a cake out of the oven after 15 minutes when the directions say to leave it in for 25. The cake would be ruined. So, why would God take this trial away before the time is right? It could ruin me. Right? Maybe this is a trial that will pass someday once I learn what I need to learn or maybe it's a trial that will always be there. I have no way of knowing how long it will last. So far it's lasted 20 years. I must learn to endure this small moment well, with patience and humility even when the small moment seems to last forever and then someday I'll look into the eyes of a loving Heavenly Father and wonder how I ever doubted him.

I wonder if I should be posting such a personal thing on a public blog but this is real. It's life and sometimes life is just plain hard. And in a way I'm really glad it's not always easy...not that I want anymore trials. But....without trials I don't think most of us would learn a thing.

You Gonna Eat That?

2009-10-20T10:48:00.000-07:00

Let me tell you something about my 22 month old niece Lily. She loves to eat! She could win a pie eating contest against 10 other grown men. She has no problem stealing the food of others when they are not looking. She will find the smallest cookie crumb on the ground and eat it as if she hasn't eaten in days. Her appetite is insatiable and I just love watching her put it away. It's quite the show.

Last night I was at my sisters playing with the kids. At dinner Madelyn, her 4 year-old sister was taking forever to eat her roll and Lily kept stealing it. Madelyn would protest and steal the roll back. Lily didn't care. She wanted carbs and nothing was going to get in her way so she persisted. I really admire her determination to get what she wants.

After dinner we played Hungry Hungry Hippo. Madelyn still had not finished the roll. She would take a bite every once in a while and she was still fighting Lily for it. Lily got bored with the game after a while and disappeared. A couple of minutes later, Madelyn looked at the ground and asked "Where's my bread?"

I started laughing so hard. "Oh Maddy, Lily took your roll. That's so funny!" Fortunately, Maddy was able to at least pretend to see the humor in the situation and started to laugh as well. Then Lily walked in the room with her face full of bread. She was smart enough to know that she had to leave the room if she wanted that roll but didn't realize she would be busted if she walked back into the room before finishing it...or maybe getting caught doesn't bother her. I just love her!

Love

2009-10-02T11:44:00.000-07:00

Is it possible to fall in love with a piece of furniture? Two days ago, I was checking out this fabulous blog and when I saw this couch it was love at first sight. Try not to drool on my couch, K? Happy Friday!

Couch by http://www.atlantabartlett.com/ via http://www.creaturecomforts.typepad.com/

Dodgin' Bullets

2009-09-18T11:21:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago my roommate Anna and I moved into a great townhouse that our friend Becky bought. Becky has been unable to move in. First she had to wait for the doggy door,then her parents sprinklers exploded and then she got sick. One thing after another has stopped her from moving in. Maybe I should say one miracle after another stopped her from moving in. It all makes sense now. Here is why.....

Yesterday was a very interesting day. I was in my bedroom at 7:15 AM when I heard the doorbell ring. Then I heard my roommate, Anna talking with someone and then she came down to my bedroom. She was shaken up and asked me if I had heard a really loud noise the night before around midnight. I remembered hearing a crash or something but it wasn't that loud to me. Then she told me that the neighbor had just come to say that he had an accident with his gun ( I think he was cleaning it or something) and that it went through his headboard and wall and wanted to see if it went through our wall. It sure did! It made it's way through Becky's bedroom wall, through her bathroom wall, through the bathroom door, then it ricocheted off the mirror and landed on the floor. I was in shock when I saw it but not shaken up like Anna or as upset as poor Becky was when she found out when Anna called her and told her about it. By the time I got to work it started to hit me a little harder and as the day went on I was more and more shocked. I was mostly grateful that Becky had not been there. I was upset that the neighbor had waited so long to come by and check. No, we didn't call the cops. If I had realized that a gun had come through the wall before the neighbor had come by, I'm sure I would have called 911 or maybe just passed out. I can't say but after the fact it just seemed..well...after the fact. Anna said that he was obviously upset and he will definitely be paying for it. My biggest concern was that he had been drinking or something and that he would again mess around with his gun while drinking but that concern was resolved and I feel safe now. Well sort of. In my head, I know that everything is OK but I was too traumatized last night to sleep in my own room (which is not where the bullet came in) and had to watch Little Women on the couch to get to sleep. It's easy to relax watching hottie Christian Bale.( but does anyone think that Laurie and Amy were a bad match?) Anyway, when I got home last night I measured the length from the floor to the top of my bed and then the length from the floor to the bullet hole in Becky's room. The top of the bed is 26" from the floor (my bed is on risers and Becky has the same risers) and the bullet hole is 33" from the floor. I figured Becky would have put her bed against that wall because it makes the most sense. I just sat there and cried on the floor for a minute and once again thanked Heavenly Father for keeping her out of that room. Then Anna and I took pictures and made a video of the damage. It's hard to explain how it all feels. I have moments where I just cry from the trauma and moments where I cry because I feel so lucky and happy that God placed obstacles in Becky's way. I also have moments where I laugh because the whole things is just so crazy. We live in a great place. We really do but weird things have happened to us..like the time our neighbors gave us hate mail for something we didn't do. Sometimes we just have to laugh.

This experience reminded me of a couple of things. #1 God really does know what he is doing. #2 People need to be more careful with their guns. I'm fine with my neighbors owning guns as long as they are careful. #3 Next time I hear a loud noise in the middle of the night I should probably get my butt out of bed and check it out.

2009-09-11T11:25:00.000-07:00

Is anything the same since September 11th? Has anything changed? Is the world really different? Well, I feel different. I remember driving to work that dreadful morning and hearing on the news that 2 planes had hit the Twin Towers. I didn't even know what the World Trade Center was and I didn't really understand what was happening. I didn't even know who Osama Bin Laden was. Then I got to work and as the morning went on I watched the news. I watched the planes fly into the towers over and over and over again. I have probably seen those images at least a hundred times since then. I still can't believe it really happened. I remember going home that day and being glued to the TV. I remember people on TV walking around with pictures of missing loved ones hoping against hope to find them alive. I remember crying as I prayed that night. For the first time in my life, I actually felt sorry for God. What must it feel like to have your children do this to each other? I kept telling him how sorry I was. I couldn't stop saying " I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." I felt so much agony because of it. I realize God has the big picture but what does it feel like, I wonder, to send the spirits he created down to earth to parents who will teach them to murder in his name? Does his heart break? I don't really know. I begged him to comfort those who had lost parents, children, husbands and wives. My heart broke for them.
The rest of the week it seemed so unfair and strange to get up everyday and go to work like nothing was different. But I felt like everything was different. Life would never be the same. I didn't know what that meant but I knew it was true. It was. It is. I don't know how I feel about the IRAQ war in particular. But I know I hate terrorists. There are so many of them. They teach their children to hate us. They breed hate. I feel so helpless. I just wish I could fix it. I just wish I could snap my fingers and make evil go away.

Blake

2009-07-16T08:45:00.000-07:00

Yesterday as I walked out my front door to leave for work I could hear someone saying "Hi" to me. I looked down the stairs and there was Blake, my 5 year old neighbor. He's blonde and has a huge thing for brunettes. It doesn't seem to bother him that I'm old enough to be his mother (or in some countries, his grandmother). He was sitting on the steps eating a donut with his cute little sister Kierlyn who looks like a doll and weighs less than her donut. We had an exchange that left me laughing all day. It went like this:

Me: "Whatcha doin' Blake?"
Blake: "We're moving today. We're going to our next house. What are you doing?"
Me: "I'm on my way to work."
Blake: "Well, what are your plans today?"
Tiffany (his mom): " I think he just asked you out."
Me : " Oh. Did you want to take me out for a cup of coffee or something?" I thought that might have thrown him off since us Mormons don't drink coffee but he just sat there with a big smile on his face.
Than I told him that I would help them move when I got off work if they still needed help but they were all done when I got home.

I'll miss you, Blake! I hope you find a beautiful new brunette friend in your new ward, who will meet you at the drinking fountain and walk you back to Primary.

Check This Out!

2009-06-15T08:38:00.000-07:00

I sure could fit lots of groceries in that big old bucket.

Click on the bike to help me win and you can enter to win too!

2009-02-12T12:09:00.000-08:00

Benefit Concert For Nie Nie

2009-01-13T10:41:00.001-08:00

A while ago I posted this blurb about Nie Nie and her sister Courtney who have captivated countless people with their blogs. Nie Nie and her husband Mr. Nielsen were in a plane crash last year and are in recovery. Mindy Gledhill is performing at a benefit concert for Nie Nie on February 2nd. See this cute flyer and mindygledhill.com for the deets. Please please buy tickets and come!

Click on this link for an awesome slideshow

2008-12-12T11:27:00.001-08:00

http://deseretbook.com/reflections/

We'll miss you Elder Wirthlin!

2008-12-02T10:07:00.000-08:00

Did I mention that I'm wearing red today?

2008-11-21T12:41:00.000-08:00

I know nothing about football but still.....

GO UTES!!

Another favorite

2008-11-21T11:20:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite moves is Fiddler on the Roof. I'm not sure I can pick just one reason but here are two of my favorite parts.

This is my favorite line from the song If I Were a Rich Man:

"If I were rich, I'd have the time that I lack to sit in the synagogue and pray and maybe have a seat by the Eastern wall and I'd discuss the holy books with the learned men, several hours every day. That would be the sweetest thing of all."

I guess it's my favorite because the idea of being able to devote as much time as I want to the pursuit of knowledge sounds like a dream but I feel a little silly saying that considering how little time I sacrifice to do so...I'll be working on that.

Topol who plays Tevye has one of the most intense faces I have ever seen. He looks like he had a really hard life. Tevye has a strong sense of tradition. He also has a bad temper. He get's frustrated with so much adversity and questions God sometimes but he's humble enough to know he needs Him . He's always talking to God. And I love when he says this to him:

"Troubles, troubles.That's all you hear from me, right? But who else can we simple people take our troubles to? You know, sometimes I wonder, who do you take your troubles to?"

I wonder....who does he take his troubles to?

Now go rent the movie! It's the best!

Shepherds of Israel by John R. Lasater

2008-11-21T10:57:00.000-08:00

Here is an excerpt from one of my favorite conference talks ever. I remember the first time I heard this story. I was having a terrible day and it I got really emotional as I was reminded what the Savior does for me.

Some years ago, it was my privilege to visit the country of Morocco as part of an official United States government delegation. As part of that visit, we were invited to travel some distance into the desert to visit some ruins. Five large black limousines moved across the beautiful Moroccan countryside at considerable speed. I was riding in the third limousine, which had lagged some distance behind the second. As we topped the brow of a hill, we noticed that the limousine in front of us had pulled off to the side of the road. As we drew nearer, I sensed that an accident had occurred and suggested to my driver that we stop. The scene before us has remained with me for these many years.
An old shepherd, in the long, flowing robes of the Savior’s day, was standing near the limousine in conversation with the driver. Nearby, I noted a small flock of sheep numbering not more than fifteen or twenty. An accident had occurred. The king’s vehicle had struck and injured one of the sheep belonging to the old shepherd. The driver of the vehicle was explaining to him the law of the land. Because the king’s vehicle had injured one of the sheep belonging to the old shepherd, he was now entitled to one hundred times its value at maturity. However, under the same law, the injured sheep must be slain and the meat divided among the people. My interpreter hastily added, “But the old shepherd will not accept the money. They never do.”
Startled, I asked him why. And he added, “Because of the love he has for each of his sheep.” It was then that I noticed the old shepherd reach down, lift the injured lamb in his arms, and place it in a large pouch on the front of his robe. He kept stroking its head, repeating the same word over and over again. When I asked the meaning of the word, I was informed, “Oh, he is calling it by name. All of his sheep have a name, for he is their shepherd, and the good shepherds know each one of their sheep by name.”
It was as my driver predicted. The money was refused, and the old shepherd with his small flock of sheep, with the injured one tucked safely in the pouch on his robe, disappeared into the beautiful deserts of Morocco.

I don't know why he loves me so much or why he picks me up when I'm sad. I just know he does.

Click here for the rest of the talk.

Random Day

2008-11-21T09:51:00.000-08:00

While my job is chaos January through April there is plenty of downtime the rest of the year. I try to use that time productively but sometimes I lack the focus. So while I should be reading the IRS website since it relates to my job I find myself surfing the web aimlessly today and since they have taken my facebook away I feel I should warn you that I will probably be posting some random stuff today.

Sometimes.....

2008-11-21T09:09:00.000-08:00

Sometimes people we have never met can captivate us. Sometimes stories of people we have never met will grab onto our hearts and have a profound effect on us. If you haven't read these 2 blogs I suggest you do so now. Then, go hug someone you love.

http://blog.cjanerun.com/

http://www.nieniedialogues.blogspot.com/

I am thankful for...

2008-11-18T08:24:00.001-08:00

Yesterday I was having kind of a rough day. I decided to go the 44th wards Family Home Evening for an early Thanksgiving dinner. Before we ate we had a chance to make a list of some things we are thankful for. It made me feel sooo much better. I highly recommend it. I thought I would share my list with you.

I am thankful for:

The Savior

The Gospel

prayer

Mom

family

Temples

The Commandments

hula hooping

covered parking

That I am not Jon and Kate plus 8

shelter

America

rockin' roommates

friends

church (including the buildings)

fire

scriptures

fabric softener

hope

faith

charity

giggling babies

clever toddlers

today

tomorrow

righteous examples

Becky for throwing me a birthday party

Charlotte for sharing a birthday party with me

the healing power of the Atonement

the refiners fire

garlic

cheese

people who believe in me

good music

knowing that Heavenly Father has the big picture

knowing that I can learn from my mistakes

dinner at my sisters

technology ( always and forever)

Abuelita ( I don't have a grandmother from Mexico, I mean the hot chololate)

hot summer nights

stars

Haagen Dazs

change and growth

service

meaningful conversations

other people's talents

being invited to stuff

I should probably make these lists more often. Life is good!

Proposition 8

2008-10-28T11:39:00.000-07:00

I have been thinking alot lately about Proposition 8 lately and why it's so important to pass it. There are lot's of arguments for and against Proposition 8 and I will list a website or two at the bottom of this post but I'm not going to address all the arguments. There are only a few days left to vote on this and time is of the essence so I'm just going to try to keep this simple but I am going to get personal. My father died 2 days before I was born. When I was just a baby my mother remarried. George adopted me and he was the only father I have ever known. He and my mother seperated when I was about 13. Eventually he decided that he was justified in cutting himself off from some of his children including me. As time goes by, it feels like I never really had a father at all. I don't mean to complain about my life or give the impression that I'm feeling sorry for myself. That's not the point. I have been blessed with a good family. I love my mother.... but I don't want another mom. What I really want is one mom and one dad. I want a dad who loves me. Men and women are different. They are equal but they are not the same and they are not supposed to be. I feel like I'm missing out on something not having a father daughter relationship. So, those of you in California who are getting ready to vote on Proposition 8 and those of you located everywhere else, think for a minute about the right of a child to have what is natural. Not having a father in my life doesn't feel natural. I can feel a huge void because of it. It hurts. I still have a wonderful life. It's a trial in life that God knew I could handle and it certainly isn't the end of the world. On the other hand, intentionally bringing a child in this world through fertility treatments with no intention of giving them a traditional family or fighting for the rights for equal adoption rights for same-sex couples is selfish and unfair and now the professionals who think that these practices are immoral are being sued for not giving in and sadly they are losing. This article names a few who have been punished for trying to stand with God on this issue. http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=91486191 My fear is that if Proposition 8 doesn't pass and same-sex marriage continues to be legal there that these cases are only the beginning.

This isn't about hating people for being different than me. Saying that gays are bad people is no more true than saying that all heterosexuals are good. I know there are kind and loving people out there living a gay lifestyle and just because I disagree with them very strongly doesn't mean I don't like them as individuals. However, loving someone and condoning their actions is not the same thing and knowing that two people are good hearted doesn't change my mind about their marriage being acceptable. It's sad to me that people write conviction off as bigotry and accuse others of being hateful because they stand up for tradional values. If you call me hateful for supporting Proposition 8 then you don't know my heart at all. I love children and I love family and I know that fighting to preserve marriage is the right thing to do.

http://www.protectmarriage.com/

http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage

Long Lost Loss

2008-07-11T08:38:00.001-07:00

I'm in a bit of shock so I hope this make sense....

The internet is a crazy place. You can find just about anything....cheap airline tickets, deals on clothes. Some people even find love. I like to find long lost friends. There are so many social networking sights that just about anyone who wants to be found can be found....but sometimes I have found that the joys of being reunited with old friends are often mixed with sad news.

Growing up in California my sister and I spent much time in the home of The Sanchez Family. They were our babysitters. Just about anytime my parents went anywhere we were at the home of Ray and Annette Sanchez and their 4 daughters Kamaile, Noelani, Makamae and Auli'i(They eventually had a son , Pono, but that was around the time we lost touch). I can't remember not knowing them. I have so many memories there. I remember being there for days when my parents went on trips. I remember bedtime was at 8 o'clock except for Thursdays when The Cosby Show was on. I remember when Auli'i was just a tiny baby. I remember Annette doing my hair for school picture day. I remember tofu and postum and Auli'i eating my mint chocolate flavored chapstick. (I guess after tofu and postum even chapstick tastes good, ha ha).

Eventually we lost touch with the Sanchez Family. We had moved here and there and at one point we thought that they had moved also. It happens. Over the years I would do the occasional internet searching to see if I could find the girls and one day I just happened to search for the right thing and bam... I had found one of the sisters.

I called my sister right away. She wasted no time. She called Noelani and they chatted for a while and then my sister called me. It was so cool to know we had found them and that we would all be reunited again but it was bittersweet. There was unexpected news and it wasn't happy news. Annette had died a couple years before of cancer. This was not what I wanted to hear. It wasn't supposed to work out that way. I spent the rest of the day in shock. Happy to have found the sisters but sad at the same time. I didn't know how I would feel when I saw the rest of the family. I got choked up at the blessing of her first grand-child and wished that she could be there and I still get a little weepy when I see pictures of her but I'm glad to know she is not living in pain.

Fast forward to the last couple of weeks....I find another child friend, Mimi, on myspace. (I just can't help myself. I want to know what is going in peoples lives). I met Mimi and her sister Gabbi at girls camp. In my 13 year old mind they were the coolest people ever. Gabbi promised to take me to my first church dance. She was about 2 years older than me and I practically worshipped her (and her friend Carol). They were so smart and knew everything about boys and life and they could do no wrong. Mimi was cool and a little rebellious and dressed way better than all of my other friends. We lost touch after high school and I never heard from her or Gabbi until now. A couple of weeks ago I found Mimi on myspace and sent her a message. Today I got her reply and I was excited to hear from her but their was bad news.. Gabbi died 5 years ago of cancer. I am so glad to be in touch with Mimi again and I am so grateful that with all the bad and horrible things the internet has to offer that it also can do great things like bring together old friends. However I am in shock and I am sad. I just expected normal news...like that she was married with a couple of kids driving around in a volvo or something. I guess that's how life is. You can't escape death. Loss will always be there in some form or another. Life is a hard thing. If it wasn't tough then it probably wouldn't be worth living. We wouldn't learn. We wouldn't grow. I am so grateful for this life and for the people that I meet that add to who I am. I am so glad to be alive and I just want to live the best life I can and make the most of it. I am so blessed to be here. I am so grateful for my memories with old friends and family and look forward to making new ones. I'm not afraid of death but I hope I live a long time. Whether I live to see the second coming or die tomorrow I am so grateful to know for sure that there is more to life that just this life and that I will see my loved ones again and now I shall quote Elder Maxwell because he was a genius.

"For all of us, because of the marvelous Atonement, death is only a comma, not a period.” Elder Neal A. Maxwell

Swimsuit Trauma

2008-06-27T09:25:00.000-07:00

Let me start out by saying that I do not hate my body. It's not perfect but I think our imperfections make us real and a few stretch marks never killed anyone. On the other hand I do believe in a little bit of modesty and mystery which todays swimsuits do not seem to advocate. The last thing I want is some creep at the pool seeing that much of me. Gross! There are some fabulous swimsuits being made out there for girls who desire a little more coverage and I am so grateful for those. However, every body type is different and finding a swimsuit proved to be quite the challenge....nightmare actually this year. I probably should have started looking the second they hit the stores or ordered one online months ago and sadly, I left my relatively modest tankini in Washington and its probably been sold at DI by now. So 2 fridays ago I ventured out to purchase 2 things...a pair of running shoes and a swimsuit. I found the shoes...no swimsuit. 3 trips to the mall later I finally found one. Was it modest? Not really. Was it affordable? Not really but it did suit a particular need or two. So I just dropped an obscene amount of money on some fabric just to wear a tanktop and boardshorts over it all summer. Next year, I'll start looking sooner. For now, thank goodness for cover-ups and I am so excited for my first hot summer in ages and many trips to the pool!!

Spam

2008-06-02T12:46:00.001-07:00

Can anyone tell me how to delete unwanted comments? I've been spammed.

Stuff I've Never Done Before

2008-03-10T11:52:00.000-07:00

I like to try new things but I always get nervous about doing something I have never done. I always worry that I will look really dumb but I am almost always glad I did whatever the new thing is. It seems that when I have a chance to learn something new it's often in the dark. The first time I ever played Ultimate Frisbee was in the dark. I went showshoeing for the first time this weekend...in the dark. It was cool. We went to Midway up by Park City. The starts were out. It was gorgeous. It was a way easy trail which is a good thing since I haven't worked out lately. It was also really icy...so I guess I was Iceshoeing. Oh...and another thing. One of my shoes were broken. It really wasn't horrible. It just wouldn't tighten very well. When I returned my rented shoes and told them they were broken, they gave me a free snowboard package. I better hurry and use that and with my crazy schedule.... It will probably be one more adventure in the dark.

Another thing I finally did this weekend was go to the Family History Center with some members of my ward. My ward is on a family history kick right now.* I have been wanting to start my genealogy for some time but always find an excuse not too. I really don't have much information about my father's side. My dad died before I was born. By then he was in his 60s and he was quite a bit younger than the rest of his siblings so most of them were gone by then too. I think I met one of his siblings when I was a baby but I really don't know anything about them. I can't explain exactly how I felt in there but as I stared at these names of grandparents and great grandparents I felt something for them. They were not just names but my names. They belonged to me. I felt responsible for them. ( A little Malachi 4:6 ish)I felt love for them and a need to see them again and I could have started to cry...but I didn't. I didn't get very far. I had to go to work and I forgot my membership number so I couldn't see what work had been done for them. But I am excited to go back and see what I can do to for them. So, for those of you wanting to get started I would say, Start now. You'll be glad you did.

*You may be wondering why Mormons are so interested in family history. Here is a direct quote from familysearch.org

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints emphasizes the importance of family relationships and believes that families can be united in the most sacred of all human relationships—as husband and wife and as parents and children—in a way not limited by death. Through priesthood authority from God, marriages are performed in temples. These marriages can continue throughout this life and for all eternity. In addition, children are "sealed" to their parents, meaning that their relationship to their parents will continue even after death. In order to give these same blessings to their deceased ancestors, Church members seek information about their ancestors to be able to perform marriages and sealings on their behalf. These ancestors may then choose to accept these sacred rites.

For only 9 Grand.....

2008-03-07T11:20:00.000-08:00

A few months ago my friend Danielle sent me a picture of this creative outdoor furniture set. It almost seems a little juvenile but at the same time I could totally get into owning something like this...
especially if I had a deck....

http://marketplace.hgtv.com/Product.aspx?Lid=2393-N7022332

Death and Taxes

2008-02-24T22:02:00.001-08:00

I'm no accountant but I somehow ended up working in the accounting department of a trucking company. It's my first tax season and I have to say.... Holy Cow!! Where do all the receipts come from?....And the phone it just rings and rings. I'm up to my ears in paperwork and since I'm the newest, I'm also the most behind. So, can you really blame me for getting off track on some of my resolutions? (hehem, Mark) I am doing better at reading more. I am finally reading the Narnia series. I'm currently on The Horse and His Boy. No one needs to make fun of me for starting off in the kids section. Hello...it's C.S. Lewis. However, I have been working insane hours and the stress has been getting to me. So, I've been stess eating. I admit it. Cookies, Pepsi, Candy..Taco's. Whatever my stressed out little heart desires and forget they gym. I lost control. I'm not too proud to say it. I forgot to have fun. I forgot about balance. l lost perspective. I ignored the muscle spasms and the break outs and the fact that if I didn't have a good laugh I was going to lose my mind. But finally2 weeks ago I couldn't ignore my body anymore. The inevitable happened. I get colds alot..every winter and sometimes in the summer. I think that I get one every 2 or 3 months. So, I wasn't too shocked last Thursday when I started coming down with a cold but I was shocked by the intensity of the cold this time. It was almost like the flu. I couldn't eat anything. I could hardly get myself out of bed to get crackers. My head felt like it would explode if I moved too quickly. It was a nightmare. If I was asleep I was ok. If I was awake...I wanted to die. This lasted a few days until I finally managed to go to the store and pick up the ingredients for Rachel Ray's Quick Chick and Noodle Soup. So, one more wake up call for the not so health consious. I can't let anything including the stress of this horrible time of the year stop me from living my life and from pursuing a healthier one. I still need to eat well and work out and have fun. If not, I'll die way too young. And face it... y0u would all miss me way too much. You might not miss my blog which is destined to be pretty lame for a little while longer but you would miss me. So, I'm going to extend my life. First, I'm going to recover from being sick. Then, I am going to have more fun and I'm going to get back to the gym. Here I go again. One more try.

08 Resolutions

2008-01-01T22:30:00.000-08:00

Well, 2007 was an interesting year..... It was emotional and scary and full of new things. I attempted to get the ball rolling on my education. That lasted 2 quarters and has been put on hold for another year. I came to Utah and started a new life where I had to find a new job and new friends. Fortunately, I am not in this alone. I have family and friends to help me through the newness. There is something about a new year that gives me hope for myself..hope that changes will occur in my life and in my soul. When the year starts over I just know that somehow I can become the person I really want to be. Last year wasn't quite that way. It started off in a nightmarish manner and my perspective was all wacko and I was overwhelmed from starting school. Even though things are kind of crazy right now, I have a more normal positive new year attitude. So, this year I will become closer to becoming that woman I want to be. I know shes somewhere inside of me waiting to come out. You know the girl I'm talking about, right? She's the best of Mother Theresa, Superwoman and Martha Stewart wrapped into one being. The spiritual and intellectual giant..the girl who always goes to the gym and eats healthy. The one who wakes up at 4 in the morning to volunteer at the soup kitchen before she goes to work and still has energy at the end of the day to practice the piano, to read the books she buys, to work out and to save the world one day at a time. ..the girl with the always balanced checkbook and manicured nails. She even makes her own clothes. She remembers the birthdays of all her loved ones and sends them all handmade gifts. Is anyone else getting sick thinking about this person,? OK, so I probably won't be waking up at 4 am to go to the soup kitchen and everyday when I go to bed there will be laundry I haven't put away, interests neglected and a head full of things I'll need to improve on the next day and the day after that and the day after that.... you get the idea. But that's what is so great about a new year and a new day for that matter. Every day is a chance to change for the better. This year I hope to increase my capacity to love others as well as myself. This year I hope to improve my spending habits. This year I hope to work out more. This year I hope to read more, serve more and be more greatful for the blessings God surrounds me with everyday. No... I don't just hope...... It's New Years! I resolve to improve on these things and if you see me not improving you have permission to kick me in the behind. Here's to a New Year!

Oh... Life

2008-01-01T22:22:00.000-08:00

So, as you can see my blog is kind of like one of those old abandoned western towns with one dirt road and a single ball of tumbleweed flying through it. Empty. Its not that I had lost interest....just inspiration, I guess. My whole life seems to be up in the air right now and its hard to sit down and think let alone write about my life. Life is good and all but a little uncertain. I am still living at my sisters and I'm not sure where I am going to live next. I've looked at a couple of perfectly nice places but so far nothing has felt quite right. The title of my blog was Back to School at 30 something....um, well, I'm not exactly living up to that title right now either so I'm trying to figure out what to call my blog now. With all the chaos of life I dropped the ball on getting my financial aid for January so at this point I would need nothing short of a miracle to start classes this winter so unless I want to go to summer school, I may be taking way more time off than I wanted to. But I imagine everything will turn out all right. I am excited to see what happens next. I know that I'll find an apartment soon and get back into school sometime before my 40th birthday. In spite of so much uncertainty, living in Utah has been pretty good so far. It's fun to see my sister all the time and it was so great to be here when my new niece, Lily arrived. The twins are so funny and it is so fun to see them grow. Here are some of the highlights since I have been here:
Seeing General Conference from the Conference Center for the first time ever
Celebrating Jamie and Traci's 31st b-day
Getting hired officially at my temp job
Seeing Madelyn and Dallin in their Halloween costumes
Teaching the twins to say "Are you ready to rock?!!"
Celebrating my birthday with Esther, the twins, my bff Jamie and my long lost childhood friend Kamaile along with her husband and new baby
Receiving a yummy cookie basket from Jihan
Running into Seattle friend Darlene at Mr. LDSBC
Attending my first Jazz game w/ Juanerd
Seeing Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf live at the U
Watching Sea Monsters in 3-D at the I-MAX
Being reuntied with childhood friends the Sanchez sisters
The arrival of my new beautiful niece Lilyan Alyse..but we call her Lily (born December 5, 2007)
Several meals at Cafe Rio including one today with my pal Jimmy
Spending 1 day of Laura (my old roommate) and her new husband Daniel's honeymoon with them
Seeing mountaineer/opthamologist/humanatarian Dr. Geoffrey Tabin at Snowbird. I had never heard of him before but he totally inspired me.
Spending New Years Eve with friends, perfecting my Guitar Hero skills and going through a whole bag of starbursts trying to unwrap then in my mouth ( I couldn't do it but I don't think that really makes me a bad kisser... no, really... it doesn't)
So, I do have a lot of things to keep me busy and happy. Life isn't perfect and things are a little crazy but what is life without a little crazy?

ACROPHOBIA

2007-11-27T07:53:00.000-08:00

I don't remember exactly when it started but I think it was in my teenage years. I don't remember being afraid of heights until then. As a toddler I would scare my mom by climbing the cupboards. As a child I loved to climb trees. But at some point that fearless child disappeared and I became the scaredy cat I still am today. My first recollection of height being an issue is at camp when I was 14. We were supposed to repel off the side of a tree and I was overcome with fear. I did it but I didn't enjoy it. I miss the fearless child that loved being in high places. So, maybe I can find her again. I guess that is why I was excited to have a church activity at a rock climbing gym last night. It gave me a chance to see if I can bring her back. When I walked in and looked at the walls I felt nauseous for a second. I knew that I wanted to try it and I knew that it would NOT be easy. There sure were a lot of people to choke in front of. I walked around and socialized for a while ( which is even scarier for me than heights) and watched others climb. They made it look so easy. After being there for at least an hour and a half someone handed me a harness. A part of me wanted to say no but I knew I would be mad at myself if I left without climbing the wall so I just went for it. I hoped I would not freak out and get stuck up there. I hoped that my shaking would not cause me to slip. About half way up I started to panic. I froze for a minute or two wondering where to put my hand next and where to step next. I didn't want to look down but I knew I had to if I was to figure out the next step. So I did. I looked down. I found my footing and I started to move again. I kept telling myself I wouldn't get hurt and that even if I slipped my belayer would not let me plummet to my death (no matter how tired her arms were). I said a quick prayer and kept on going. When I finally made it to the top, I wasn't really sure what to do next. I listened for instruction from below and heard someone telling me to just sit down. So, I did. When I finally made it down I was so happy and so proud. I was shaky and weak but so glad I didn't give up half way up the wall like I wanted to. I'm going to go back again.. hopefully soon. I want to get rid of this lame fear of heights. Maybe next, I can get rid of the shyness problem. So.. tell me. What is your biggest phobia? Is it the same as mine? Is it as irrational as mine? I want to know.

Heres to my health

2007-11-06T14:17:00.000-08:00

So between my love of junk food and lack of creativity when it comes to food my diet is beyond terrible. Those who know me well are familiar my rarely used membership to 24 and my breakfasts consisting of a Pepsi and Little Debbie Snackcakes. I think i'm ready and I mean really ready to change this. People sometimes look at me and ask me why I am worried about working out and eating right. Maybe they think skinny people don't want to live as long or maybe they think its a compliment but just because I don't have a weight issue does not mean that I'm taking care of myself. I'm a prime candidate for osteoporosis and I can barely get my butt out of bed in the morning. I am constanlty getting headaches and I cant walk up 2 flights of stairs with huffing and puffing. Now that I am determined to change this...Where do I start? What do I eat? Last night I went to Wild Oats.. um... I have to eat everyday! If I shop there I will only be able to afford to eat a few times a week. After that, I went to Walmart and picked up a few things and I tried to stick to the healthy stuff. I found a few things but I need some help. I will not forsake junk food completely and I'm not ready to give up the Pepsi I have with my lunch but I have got to make some changes. So here I am to tell the world (or the 3 peeps that read my blog) that I am going to work harder to become healthier and stronger. So feel free to harass me about my bad habits and tell me your health woes and successes. I want to know what you eat thats fast, healthy and does not break the bank. Where do I find the best recipes for health nut wannabees? In other words Save my life!!! Leave a comment.. I'll be here wiping the cupcake frosting off my lip.

Crazy things I've done this year....

2007-09-29T12:27:00.000-07:00

Hmmm..... Well, how about moving to a place where it snows on the 29th of September?

My New Utah Life

2007-09-18T23:20:00.000-07:00

Well, it has been weeks since my last post. I'm still having camera issues..not the same one as before but I have no way to post any..hopefully soon. It's after midnight and I can't sleep so I thought I would attempt what may end up being a lame excuse for a post right now. Even though I can't sleep, I am pretty groggy so I hope this makes sense.

I arrived in the Salt Lake area on September 3rd around 2:00 AM and had quite the arrival. I was driving down the 15 in Kaysville, my traveling companion fast asleep, when I saw a van up ahead roll from the northbound lanes into the southbound lanes. I pulled over, woke Juan up, told him what I had just seen and called 911 while he ran over to the van to see who was in there and what their condition was. I walked over to the van while I was still on the phone and there were some other people on the phone with 911 also. There was one person in the van. I can't remember what her name was but she was alone. She was shaky and bleeding and my pal Juan was right there holding her hand, trying to keep her awake and then called a phone number of a family member or friend she kept repeating to him when the cops showed...and they arrived super fast. Anyway, he was pretty close to her and smelled no alcohol. So, she may just have fallen asleep at the wheel..or maybe she was driven off the road by a drunk driver. It was a wake up call though. I had been struggling to stay awake on the road. I think I will be a lot more careful for now on about driving when I am that sleepy. It's just not worth it.

The next morning I was so happy to see my two year old twin niece and nephew, Madelyn and Dallin. They helped me unpack my car. Madelyn was running around in my skateboarding helmet and carrying one of my purses. It was so funny. Living with my sister has worked out pretty well so far ( but it's not forever, I'm looking at a place tomorrow). Seeing the twins everyday has been so fun. I have gained a greater appreciation of what my sister goes through on a daily basis. It's not easy. They demand so much attention and require so much patience. Dallin is so sweet but he cries a ton and Madelyn is also so sweet...but I didn't know that 2 year olds could be so manipulative. My sister, Esther and I were in Target a few days ago and we had Maddy with us. She kept wanting to be held and every time I put her down she would start to cry and I would give in and pick her up. I looked at her at one point and said Madelyn, "I'm going to learn to stand my ground with you. I'm going to get tough here." She was wearing her pink sunglasses at the time ( because sunglasses are completely necessary inside the store) and just as I was telling her that I was going to get tough she lifted up her sunglasses so that I could see the tears in her eyes. Evil child. It was as if she saying, "No you're not. You'll never be able to stand my tears." See?! MANIPULATIVE. And Dallin requires just as much attention but he is pickier than Madelyn. He usually wants it all from his mom so it's harder to share the burden. Anyway, I love them and they bring me a lot of joy but I see how hard it is and I have gained a greater appreciation for all the moms out there who remain patient through the temper tantrums and the food thrown on the floor.

I was really blessed to get work right away. It's a temp to hire position and I don't know if I am going to get the job yet but it's nice to have something for now.

I still haven't had a chance to visit and catch up with very many people but I did get a chance to see my childhood friend Jamie once for Cafe Rio and bonding time and I am looking forward to seeing everyone else...and their kids.

I feel really happy about being here. I miss my friends in Washington but being here just feels right. It's hard starting over and having to make new friends and not knowing just what I am in for here but I have such a feeling of great peace that I am where I am supposed to be. That doesn't happen all the time. I could be really scared and sometimes I am but I expected to cry a lot more and feel a lot lonelier once I moved here but I just feel so happy and full of hope that everything is going to be ok.

So, that's my life right now in a nutshell. Scary yet peaceful... I guess.

And the panic sets in

2007-08-25T22:57:00.000-07:00

What am I thinking? How can I just pick up and move to Utah? Am I insane? Can I really do this? Can I really leave my home of 4 + years and start over? Well....I am sick of the rain and the clouds and I do miss the dreadful heat of Utah. This summer in Seattle has been way too mild for me. I really really miss my family. But.... moving means starting from scratch. I still have to find a job. Most of my friends there are married now, so socially..I'm back to square one. I am transitioning into a new age bracket..31 in 2 months. Is this really a good time to be moving? OK, so there may never be a good time and this does feel like the right thing to do. For the past year or so I have really been wanting to move. At first I wasn't thinking about leaving the state. I just wanted to change it up a little. I was thinking.. 20 miles South....not 800. But then I realized that I was just too far away from my family. They are all in California and Utah and I never ever see them. So the decision is made. Utah it is.

As I contemplate my move, I keep thinking about my life here in Washington for the last few years and the people who have touched me. So I wanted to mention a few of them. I hope you don't get nauseous during another one of my sappy love posts.

Princess Missi: Missi has been my roommate for over 4 years now. She is so talented and smart. She talked me into taking ballet lessons and has always shown me what it means to serve others.

Darci J. to E. : My first real gal pal after my move up here. She took part in helping me to drive a manual transmission. I spent much of my first summer here playing on her lake. I never did learn to water ski. I think it's a lost cause but I did tube like I had never tubed before and saw the best illegal fireworks show I could have ever hoped for.

Jihan: My twin..my kindred spirit. Jihan believes in me. I think the person she sees when she looks at me is far better than the person I am and it makes me want to be that person she thinks I am. She has always amazed me. She is so thoughtful and creative.

Theresa: Theresa is so funny! I have so much fun when are together. Her friendship has helped me through some rough times. I will always cherish our memories of tennis and The Cheesecake Factory.

Midge: She has the best laugh ever and has no idea how beautiful she really is. I have missed her so much since she followed her sister to DC.

Sarah M: An image of elegance. A heart of gold. I miss the family dinners and talks and walks around the neighborhood.

Jimmy: One of my most trusted confidants...Where would I be without his wisdom and coaching? He aided me in my attempt to embrace single life and convinced me to expect miracles and start college. I'm really bad about listening to advice but I always listen to him because he gives advice in such a non-invasive manner but sometimes he'll use tough love and I can never get mad at him for it because it's always what I need to hear.

Katie D: The beautiful genius. I am so glad that friends and Institute brought us together.

The Kid: Fugo vestri somnium quod exsisto artifex vos es vilis futurus.

Laura D: My hippy roommate. I doubt I will ever have another roommate who is so happy to see me and who says hi to me every time we pass in the hall as if we haven't seen each other for days. I will miss that more than she knows.

And I can't forget the person who got me up here in the first place.

That would be Juan, the ex. Although it never worked out I will always be greatful for his friendship and the amazing person he is. Juan is kind and generous and an example of true discipleship and I am so glad we are still friends.

I have had a chance to get to know some great people up here. Sometimes it is impossible to find the words to tell people how much they mean to me but these friends and others have taught me much about who I am and what I am capable of and who I want to be. In some ways I think of Washington as the place where I finally grew up. Well, maybe not completely. There will always be more growing to do, but the last 2 years have been the hardest and the scariest and maybe even the most painful two years of my adult life. They have also been my favorite. I started college (and now I get to start over in another state). I took chances. Some led to happiness, some led to a broken heart. Some led to both. I took ballet. I learned to like myself. I'm still very shy but I'm also much more social. Now, I am stronger and more hopeful than before. The people I have met and bonded with and loved, said good-bye to, have been lifted up and inspired by..... and laughed with are a part of me forever.

And in 8 days, I'll drive away seeking new friends and new adventures and new discoveries about life and me. I'm full of fear and excitement. A part of me wants to stay right where I am but I know I can't do that. I just have to be strong and look at the road ahead of me, through the tears, with faith that this is the best thing for me and hope that the snow doesn't drive me crazy and that Washington does not forget me.

Josh Groban is so in love with me!!

2007-08-19T18:51:00.000-07:00

OK....maybe not yet....but it could happen, couldn't it? Last night a ticket to see Josh fell into my hands and I took the chance to see his dreaminess. I screamed, I swooned, I melted.... I'm surprised I can still stand. The kid's got pipes! I love that scrawny curly haired musical prodigy. I didn't know he could play the drums but he totally wailed on them last night and I was so surprised. So between his silly jokes, his caffeine induced energy, the drum incident, and his voice... I will forever be a die hard fanatic..... How does Anne Groban sound?

Moving Update

2007-08-14T12:59:00.000-07:00

Only 19 days left until the big move!

Jihan my girl

2007-08-13T13:11:00.001-07:00

So, I consider myself pretty lucky. I have some amazing friends. I'm parting with some people who are so important to me. Take my old married friend Jihan, for instance. It may seem a litte weird to mesh the life of a single party animal like myself and an old married woman like Jihan ( If only you could hear the irony in my voice, you would know how funny that really is) but we make it work. We don't see each other as much as we would like and I do miss those days where we could hang out as single gals, hair in the wind, partying like girlscouts but life changes and it's great. It's nice to know that our friendship can roll with the punches when our lives change. There are many reasons I love Jihan. Here is a list of some of them.

Jihan shares my hatred for green jello.
She's obsessed with some very cool things...such as vespa's, coats (which I like to steal) and travel.
She's made me a more classy dresser.
She's cultured and sophisticated and can tell me what fork to use at a fancy restaurant.
She'll eat Mexican food with me when she would rather be eating Thai.
She takes a half an hour to order an ice cream cone.
Her opinion of me is way too high and gives me something to work towards.
She's got charisma coming out of her ears and can have a conversation with anyone about just about anything... a quality I long for.
She cares about the people around her.
She's an intellectual giant but she'll still watch The Lizzie McGuire Movie with me.
She has great taste in Annes.
She's as equally skilled in ballet as I am.
She loves me!

Jihan is so talented and creative and intelligent.....I could go on and on. I am so glad that God sent her to me. Unfortunately, we have terrible camera chemistry. One of us (usually me) never looks nearly as cute in the pictures we take together as we are in real life. But here is a link to her blog where she has a couple of us posted. http://pisaisfalling.blogspot.com/2007_06_01_archive.html

Oh, and one more reason I love Jihan. She has spent countless hours shopping with me for important events and has never complained about how impossible I am during a stressful shopping crisis such as the Boat Dance of 05 or Dental Prom 06.

My poor little blog

2007-08-13T10:31:00.000-07:00

My blog is looking a little sad these days but please do not lose hope in it. I'm having trauma due to camera/computer issues. I do have pictures to post and they are just sitting there in my camera waiting to come out. I think I should have that problem resolved in a day or two though. Wish me luck!!

President James E. Faust, second counselor in the First Presidency of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

2007-08-10T10:36:00.000-07:00

So, I am a little weepy today... a little down. I am sad about the death of a man who I have never met yet loved and trusted so much. President James E. Faust, was a sweet and gentle man and a true disciple of Christ. His death is no surprise but there are some people who I just want to live forever. I remember a few years ago, at the LDS General Conference he opened up his talk with a joke about the Golden Years being filled with led. That was the first time I ever saw him in a wheelchair unable to stand for his talk. He said that it was a slipped disk and that he would be ok. A few months later at the Christmas Devotional, he was still in that chair and I lost it. I couldn't stop crying. He wasn't crying though. He still smiled. He was still happy. Think I have an issue watching people get old? Hmm...and I want to go nursing school. Perhaps I should rethink that plan. I am so greatful for his example of love and I will never forget him. As death makes way for new life and new opportunities for others to serve and grow, I know his influence will continue to touch those who knew him. I also know that this is not the end and that his spirit lives on.

It's official...Goodbye Seattle...Hello Utah!

2007-08-06T10:25:00.000-07:00

Sometimes a girl has got to shake things up a bit. So after 4 + years in the rainy city I am moving to Utah once again. It's true. I will miss this area so much. There are so many things I need to do before I go. I must make one more trip to Pike's Place Market and enjoy one last breakfast at Maltby Cafe. I have never ever been to Dixie's Barbeque to Meet the Man and I can't leave without having that experience. I should probably make a trip over to Snoqualmie Falls even though I am way unprepared for such a hike. I'm running out of weekends here! I want to know: What is your favorite place in Western Washington? Is there a restaurant in Seattle that you just can't get enough of? A favorite place to go camping or hiking? Do you love bonfires at Golden Gardens as much as I do? ( I caught on fire there once, it was sooo traumatic) I'll miss you Seattle!

Baby Girl Coming Soon!

2007-07-25T10:58:00.001-07:00

A few weeks ago my prego sister, Esther went in for an ultrasound but the baby was feeling bashful and wouldn't cooperate so they could not tell for sure if the baby was a boy or a girl. So, she went back today for another ultrasound and found out the exciting news. It's a girl! Just one baby this time. I hope the twins like their new sister. I can't wait to meet her. She'll make her debut sometime in December. There is something about the anticipation of a new niece or nephew that always makes my heart go pitter pat.

And the panic sets in......

2007-07-20T12:01:00.000-07:00

What am I thinking? How can I just pick up and move to Utah? Am I insane? Can I really do this? Can I really leave my home of 4 + years and start over? OK, I am sick of the rain and the clouds. I miss the dreadful heat of Utah. This summer in Seattle has been way too mild for me. I miss my family. But.... moving means starting from scratch. I still have to find a job. Most of my friends there are married now so I have to start from the beginning socially. I am transitioning into a new age bracket..31 in 2 months. Is this really a good time to be moving? OK, so there may never be a good time and this does feel like the right thing to do. For the past year or so I have really been wanting to move. At first I was not thinking about leaving the state. I just wanted to change it up a little. I was thinking.. 20 miles South....not 800. But then I realized that I was just too far away from my family. They are all in California and Utah and I never ever see them. So the decision is made. Utah it is.

As I contemplate my move, I keep thinking about my life here in Washington for the last few years and the people who have touched me. So I wanted to mention a few of them. I hope you don't get nauseous during another one of my sappy love posts.

Princess Missi: Missi has been my roommate for over 4 years now. She is so talented and smart. She talked me into taking ballet lessons and has always shown me what it means to serve others.

Darci J. to E. : My first real gal pal after my move up here. She took part in helping me to drive a manual transmission. I spent much of my first summer here playing on her lake. I never did learn to water ski. I think it's a lost cause but I did tube like I had never tubed before and saw the best illegal fireworks show I could have ever hoped for.

Jihan: My twin..my kindred spirit. Jihan believes in me. I think the person she sees when she looks at me is far better than the person I am and it makes me want to be that person she thinks I am. She has always amazed me. She is so thoughtful and creative.

Theresa: Theresa is so funny! I have so much fun when are together. Her friendship has helped me through some rough times. I will always cherish our memories of tennis and The Cheesecake Factory.

Midge: She has the best laugh ever and has no idea how beautiful she really is. I have missed her so much since she followed her sister to DC.

Sarah M: An image of elegance. A heart of gold. I miss the family dinners and talks and walks around the neighborhood.

Jimmy: One of my most trusted confidants...Where would I be without his wisdom and coaching? He aided me in my attempt to embrace single life and convinced me to expect miracles and start college. I'm really bad about listening to advice but I always listen to him because he gives advice in such a non-invasive manner but once in a while he will use tough love in a comical yet effective way.

Katie D: The beautiful genius. I am so glad that friends and Institute brought us together.

Laura D: My hippy roommate. I doubt I will ever have another roommate who is so happy to see me and who says hi to me every time we pass in the hall as if we haven't seen each other for days. I will miss that more than she knows.

I have had a chance to get to know some great people up here. Sometimes it is impossible to find the words to tell people how much they mean to me but these friends and others have taught me much about who I am and what I am capable of and who I want to be.

In some ways I think of Washington as the place where I finally started to grow up. The last 2 years have been the hardest and the scariest and maybe even the most painful two years of my adult life. But they have also been my favorite. I started college (and now I get to start over in another state). I took chances. Some led to happiness, some led to a broken heart. Some led to both. I took ballet. I learned to like myself. I'm still very shy but I'm also much more social. Now, I am stronger and more hopeful than ever before. The people I have met and bonded with and loved, said good-bye to, have been lifted up and inspired by..... and laughed with are a part of me forever.

And in 8 days, I'll drive away seeking new friends and new adventures and new discoveries about life and me. I'm full of fear and excitement. A part of me wants to stay right where I am but I know I can't do that. I just have to be strong and look at the road ahead of me with faith that this is the best thing for me and hope that the snow doesn't drive me crazy and that Washington does not forget me.

Anne's Ultimate Concussion

2007-07-18T10:29:00.000-07:00

So last night I played Ultimate for the 3rd time. I'm still not so good but I think I'm improving. The most memorable part of the evening though is when I ran into someone on the opposite team, bumped heads and almost bit my tongue off. I just layed there for a minute all dizzy but then I couldn't help but laugh at what a ridiculous and painful moment I was having. I may have a concussion but I suppose I will get over it. OK, so I probably don't have a concussion. I have no bruises on my face but I do have a giant mosquito bite on my cheek. We play in the dark so my friend Eric brought tiki torches which made it so much more fun!

Reason # 49 not to have a long engagement

2007-07-11T15:59:00.000-07:00

I have no idea how this ended up on the news but I thought it was funny especially these days when people expect engagements to last a couple of years.

From msn.com
LONDON - Teacher Dave Barclay flew thousands of miles across the Atlantic to Wales to attend his friend’s wedding, only to discover he was a year early.
Barclay, 34, was told about the wedding earlier in the year and assumed it was to take place in 2007.
It was only when he had flown into Cardiff from Toronto, Canada, and rang the bridegroom seeking details of the venue that he discovered the wedding was in 2008.
“I am a year early — yeah, my mates are loving it, aren’t they,” he told BBC Radio Wales.
The groom, Dave Best, had emailed his friend at the start of the year.
“He just said July the 6th and I assumed it was this year because if you tell the guy July 6th, they’re going to think it’s this year,” Barclay said.
Barclay, who has been teaching in Toronto for three years spent $1,015 on his premature flight.
“At least it’s assured me a mention in the speech next year,” he added.

Anne's Ultimate Adventure Continues

2007-07-09T10:44:00.000-07:00

I played Ultimate again on Saturday in the light and I did so much better. I'm still not very good but I caught it way more than I did last time....once with my knees even. I still dropped it a lot and can't throw it very far but I really feel like there is hope for me and my frisbee skills especially when I can see the other players. I like Ultimate.. I really really do. There were so many times when I passed up the opportunity to play because I thought I would not enjoy it or was just worried about making a fool of myself. There are so many times when I do that. I'm going to try to be more brave and try new things more often.

Anne's Ultimate Adventure

2007-07-06T10:38:00.000-07:00

I have never been athletic. I'm not coordinated and i'm not aggressive. As I get older, however the desire to find my inner athlete grows stronger. So on Tuesday for the first time ever I played Ultimate Frisbee. Over the last couple of weeks I have had the chance to practice throwing the frisbee and I wasn't very good at that. I'm also not very good at catching it. But I figure I'll get better. We met at the field (oy, the mosquito infested field, I came away with about 10 bites) after 9 PM on Tuesday which meant that half of the game was played in the dark. So here I am, this clumsy unexperienced non-athlete playing a sport I have never played before in the dark. I do remember catching the frisbee once. It was a great moment. I caught it and ran about 12 steps before I remembered that I am only allowed to run 3 steps. Ah man! My glorious moment tainted by own spaciness. I guess I was so excited about catching it that I got carried away. The other players were so kind and let me go back to the spot where I caught it and start over. Charity never faileth even on the field! I spent most of the game feeling a little lost and scared that I was going to make a fool of myself but I'm glad that I played. I'll be back next week for some more.

The next day I went to a really fun 4th of July BBQ in Bellevue and I attempted to play football in my bare feet. That went even worse than frisbee for sure. Next time i'll wear shoes.

Where does the time go?

2007-06-28T23:04:00.000-07:00

I don't remember growing so fast as a child as my nieces and nephews seem to be. I remember as a kid it seems like time stood still so often. Summer seemed to last forever. The days seemed to last forever. But now, as Robert Baird stated in the hymn, Improve the Shining Moments time truly does " fly on wings of lightning." My sister sent me these pics of her 2 year old twins the other day. I can't believe what I am seeing. They are not babies anymore. It's not just the twins. My oldest niece Spenser is 14 now and can go to church dances (For those of you unfamiliar with mormon culture, trust me, it's a milestone). I remember when she was just a tiny baby. It seems like last year. My nephews Corbin and Nathan will be in Junior High soon. I was Nathan's nanny for a few months when he was a baby and now he's competing in National Math Bee's and kicking some serious behind in school. It's tough being so far away from all these kids knowing that they are growing up and I am missing so much of it, not being the aunt I want to be, letting myself be somewhat of a stranger to my own family while I am tucked up in the corner of the country. I miss the baptisms, birthday parties and baseball games. I send their birthday cards out 6 months late but I do love them. I wonder about them. I pray for them. I want so much for them to have a strong sense of self and I pray that they will have good examples in their lives and make good choices. I love them!! I love them so much in fact, next year I just might send their birthday cards out to them on time. As long as I don't blink between now and then.

The two pictures on top are from 2 summers ago when the whole family traveled to see the twins blessed. It's a rare and precious thing to get a picture of all the nieces and nephews together. Spenser and Chandler are holding the twins on the couch and Nathan is holding Daran who is only a couple of months older than the twins.

Girlfriends, Ballet and Ice Cream

2007-06-28T22:48:00.000-07:00

Last night in ballet class Jihan and I (you can get Jihan's perspective of our Thursday night ballet adventures on her blog) almost passed out doing something called a Chaînés* (pronounced Shen- ay.) Even though I was using a spot I still got super dizzy. It was great. After class Jihan, Theresa and I walked to Baskin Robbins and got some ice cream as a reward for all of our hard work. I love girlfriends, ballet and ice cream..in that order. I know you are all probably wondering (all two or three of you that read this blog) when you are going to see a picture of us in our tutus. Maybe later... but for now you'll just have to settle for a picture of our ice cream.

What's your favorite kind of ice cream? Tell me, tell me.

*This is a common abbreviation for tours chaînés déboulés, which is a series of quick turns on alternating feet with progression along a straight line or circle. They are also know as chaînés tournes. In classical ballet it is done on the pointes or demi-pointes (on the balls of the feet).- Thanks to Missi for providing me with my ballet definitions.

Giggling Ballerina

2007-06-22T09:33:00.000-07:00

My chidhood memories of ballet are very vague. I don't remember if I liked it or if it was torture or if I was only in it for the tutu. I think I was around 6 the last time I took a class. I imagine that I probably felt pretty and maybe even like a grown-up princess. Last night I dusted off that tutu and stepped up to the bar for the first time since my childhood and I felt like a little girl again. I was giddy. I couldn't stop giggling. The other girls looked so peaceful and graceful and I was NOT graceful but I was happy. There were 5 other people in the class and I am friends with 4 of them (my roommate Missi, Amy Lee, Theresa and Jihan which made the whole experience even more enjoyable. I watched those girls plie down to the floor and wondered how their legs didn't break off at the knees and I wondered if mine would ever stop popping when I tried to copy their movement. I am so glad my talented roommate Missi talked me into it so that once a week for the next month or so I can take an hour to leave my worries behind me and feel like a little girl again. Thanks Missi! Here's to being like a little child.

Jelly Belly Art

2007-06-11T15:19:00.000-07:00

Today, my pal Theresa e-mailed me this great picture of Queen Elizabeth made out of jelly bellies. I thought it was cool.I also liked this one of Benjamin Franklin. There are more at jellybelly.com. I think my favorite jelly bellies are the watermelon and coconut flavored ones...but not together.

So, tell me. What's your favorite jelly belly?

Schools out!! (almost)

2007-06-11T10:23:00.000-07:00

So, it's been a crazy year so far. I started college. It's been really tough learning to adjust to a life or working full time, going to school and attempting to have a life outside of that. A lot of blood, sweat and tears have been involved in the last two quarters. Most of the blood, sweat and tears occur right before the tests, of course. I tend to be an eleventh hour crammer. The classes have not been that hard. Developing good habits and study skills... well that's another story. I'm excited to take the summer off and hope to return in the fall with a new perspective and determination to do my best. But I shouldn't get ahead of myself.. I still have one more week of school left. Wish me luck!!

S-E-R-R-E-F-I-N-E

2007-06-01T09:25:00.000-07:00

I love spelling bees enough to throw a party for one! So last night, my roommate and I invited some friends over(pictured above) to watch the Scripps National Spelling Bee in Washington, D.C. I discovered my love for them a couple of years ago when I was home from church with a scary case of pinkeye. I am so amazed at these kids and their dedication. Some will argue that it's not that impressive because it's just a bunch of memorization. Maybe so, but when I was 13, I certainly didn't have that kind of dedication and I definitely didn't know what etymology was. I can't even remember from one day to the next when to use effect of affect. Last year I rooted for 14 year old Saryn Hooks from North Carolina, who came in 3rd when she misspelled the word icteritious. She had great hair. This year I hoped for Isabel Jacobsen to win, but she lost when she misspelled cyanophycean. She wore a zillion bracelets. Her favorite word kak·is·toc·ra·cy became a favorite at the party, especially of my friend Dewain. The winner was Evan Forney, 13, a brilliant musician and mathemetician who "doesn't really like the spelling bee." He won with the word serrefine. Amazing kid but I was very disappointed that he won and not someone who enjoyed it a little more. Hopefully next year I will love the bee again but tonight I was glad that even though the bee let me down I had friends there to laugh with. My roommate Laura (pictured above)made a fabulous cake for the occasion.

Tennis anyone...um anyone??

2007-05-30T23:45:00.000-07:00

So Ms. Theresa and I attempted to play tennis on Memorial Day. We desperately need some coaching. It was a sad sad sight. After one of us hit the tennis ball into the pool we gave up and went shopping.

My first blog

2007-05-25T15:45:00.000-07:00

Hey, it's 2007. Maybe I should get with it and start a blog. So here it is.